The Voice in our Heads

February 5, 2016


We all have that inner voice that keeps us stuck at times. Moving forward can be difficult to do if we let this voice dominate our thoughts and feelings and ultimately define who we are.


How many times have you told yourself things like, 'You're not good enough', or 'You're not smart enough', 'You're not beautiful enough' or how about this one, 'You're not deserving of X'. It's not easy letting go of these limiting beliefs we all tell ourselves at times, but it's important to acknowledge them and find ways to move through them so that we can achieve our goals and dreams with full confidence.


However, at the same time, these thoughts can also help us evolve into the person we want and choose to be. We can use them to learn about our true desires and why we tell ourselves such nonsense. When we begin to pay attention to our thoughts we can then begin to release them and not allow them to be a part of our reality.  Don't let that particular negative statement define who you are because you are definitely NOT this thought. You can examine 'why' you are having this thought and start to ask yourself questions like, 'is this thought really true?' Do you know, with all of your heart, that this statement you're telling yourself is genuinely true? 10 out of 10 times, it's not true (see reference below to Byron Katie's 'The Work' for more detail). In doing this exercise you can begin to examine your thinking process and begin to make the changes necessary to find the clarity you seek.


Like many people, I struggled extremely with my inner voice and for so many years I made a lot of decisions that went against my core values and integrity. I refused to listen to my gut, my instinctual insight, because I was so worried about the outcomes of whatever situation I was in and/or disappointing the people in my life. I'd rather keep my mouth shut, bury the instinct and please others. I wasn't doing myself any favors and I was essentially living a life in fear and unhappiness.


In result of the limiting beliefs I had about myself, I was faced with having to deal with issues such as jealousy, insecurities, judgment, anger, blame, and resentment. I was a HOT mess!


It wasn't until I turned 31 that I became very sick with an auto immune disease and this, my friends, changed the game for me. As I struggled with the disease and lost all muscular activity for a few years which placed me in a wheelchair, I began to view life differently. Once I started to get better with the treatments and get through the rehabilitation and back on my feet again, thankfully, I started a new journey through that of holistic therapy and there is where I began my journey into mindfulness.


I started my practice of meditation and although it took me a very long time to bring down the vibrations of all the thoughts running through my head, I've been able to settle the mind more effectively. There have been SO many articles, books and workshops written and facilitated about meditation and mindfulness and believe me, it really does work! More and more people are discovering the beauty of mindfulness and how deeply it can impact their lives and in such a short time.


Mindfulness has helped me to see more clearly and banish those limiting beliefs. When they do arise, as they naturally will, I am able to grab that thought, hold it gently under control of my consciousness and release it from a reality. I have been able to move through all of those nasty issues I stated earlier and, with the guidance of my life coach, have found a place of peace and calmness. I am finally in a place where I can mindfully set the boundaries around me, when needed, and start to live my own authentic life without a second thought. Mind you, we are all human and yes I have my setbacks at times and you will too. However, knowing that you have the ability to get back to that place of nothingness...the present state of NOW, it changes the way you move forward with your thoughts and therefore your actions making life more peaceful and happy.


Meditation can bring you the balance that you are seeking in life. With a little bit of trust, patience and belief I know that you too can find your peace and calmness. There are so many wonderful and FREE resources out there for you to experience the beauty of stillness. I encourage you to search and find something that resonates with you.


Here are some of the resources I use at home and during travel;


InsightTimer mobile app (FREE) - you can bookmark your favorite guided meditations, have access to a timer for your own personal meditations, set meditation alarms, and see who else is meditating all over the world.


Deepak Chopra You Tube - A series of guided meditations for beginners and advanced. Byron Katie - Who would you be without this thought?


@tarabrach - Follow Tara on Twitter to receive beautiful guided meditations for relaxation, body awareness and a variety of helpful tips.


I encourage you to find your outlet for escaping the inner chatter. Simply begin by really listening to your thoughts and see where that takes you. Be honest and gentle with yourself as you do this and ask yourself the question(s) I mentioned above. And remember, you are NOT the thoughts in your head.


Wishing you peace!




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